Okay, so I know Christmas is supposed to be about love, family, and the birth of Christ and what not, but it’s also about PRESENTS!
I know this sounds odd from someone who has issues with consumerism, but over the last couple weeks I have been thinking alot about my daughter and how much I want her to have that moment when she walks downstairs Christmas morning and sees IT. The gift she has always wanted from Santa.
Don’t you remember that? Oh, the rollerskates! Oh, the Barbie dream house! I wanted that Barbie dream house so badly and there. it. was. In my living room. Thank you Santa.
Don’t get me wrong, I want holidays that are a much more than gifts, and I want the gifts to be in moderation, and I do want them to be gifts I feel good about.
Here is where I found the challenge.
Until yesterday, she had only mentioned two things of interest: Dora boots / backpack, which I find surprising, a) since she’s only ever seen the show once 2 years ago when we were at a friend’s house and b) since she’s starting kindergarten and frankly, her peers are into other things. The other wish? A Tinkerbell costume.
So, I told her those were nice ideas and that we’d add them to the list of possible things to ask for from Santa. But I was starting to
really
dread
the impending list-making (hard swallow - glunk)
because I knew that any list that she would make would be based on what the other kids at school have/bring, much of which I would not feel good about, what with my being replete with issues and all. She doesn’t see commercials or go shopping (by design, of course), so how could her list possibly be anything other than the items her friends are tittering about on the playground?
So…I was dreading sitting down to ask her to make a list on the one hand, and on the other hand, because I want her to have that moment where the clouds part and the angels sing when she looks under the tree, I didn’t want to “just” surprise her with things that I know she’d enjoy. I wanted her to have wish fulfillment. Quandary.
Luckily, I’m completely brilliant.
I went through a bunch of toy catalogues that had come in the mail (how they find me and why they keep coming since I’ve requested they stop, is beyond me), and I cut out pictures of different toys. About 30 things — very diverse — that I thought she might like and which I thought we’d be completely happy buying for her. I put them all on a big royal blue posterboard and called her down to see my surprise.
What fun!
First of all, she acted like the board itself was a present, she loved it. Then, I told her it was time to write a letter to Santa. I went through and told her about all of the toys and she was jazzed about everything. Then, she went about starring her favorites, which turned out to be everything, because it’s fun to draw stars in marker on posterboard. I told her to choose the 3-4 things she thought were most exciting for her letter.
I loved watching her choose. She decided to pick 4 things. Duh. Would you have picked 3? She picked: a kids’ guitar, a mini trampoline, a princess dress (small p - I’ll get a flowergirl dress on ebay, I’ve out fancied Disney before, I’ll do it again.), and a make your own rainbow poncho kit (the poncho kit was the thing she was most excited about, couldn’t-contain-it kind of excited.)
But then she decided she wanted some colored wooden blocks even more than the trampoline (seriously? yes. seriously.).
So, she wrote to Santa - one carefully printed letter at a time - and nearly squealed as she showed her Dad her adorably wretched handiwork.
So, we’ll get her that stuff. And (gulp) we’ve also tentatively decided, although it’s not on the official list, to get her
something
Disney Princess.
yep. The lone Snow White toothbrush is getting a friend.
What I’ll actually get, I’m not sure, something small, but she is asking for it in no uncertain terms, and I can feel it starting to become a bigger deal to her (she’s feeling left out), and I certainly don’t want her laying in bed pining away for princess. You know what a mess unrequited love is. Chalk one up for word of mouth marketing. If not for preschool, she wouldn’t even know who they are.
Of course, I’ll probably have to steal it to avoid actually giving those sneaky bastages my money, so if you see a quirky human interest story on the news about professor and mother of two who was arrested for stuffing a Cinderella chapstick in her bra, well, I guess that will be the end of my pseudonymous life.
Lisa C.
December 3, 2007 | 4:20 am1
One of my favorite TV shows (How I Met Your Mother) had an episode where one of the characters is in a really crappy play featuring Greed, Envy, Something, and CONSUMERISM. Every time they said the word “consumerism” they held a mirror up to the face of a member of the audience. It was hilarious, and I think about it every time I read the word “consumerism” on your blog.
Do you think that the whole Santa myth plays into the consumerism that you’re so much against? I mean, just the thought of this person who can deliver whatever you want… to me it just seems to feed the fire. I liked your idea of the poster… I think that’s really cool. I also avoid the toy section of our local Target like the plague (well, since last year when we couldn’t seem to leave Target without a piece of plastic crap that took 30 minutes to choose) so my son, also 4, doesn’t have the chance to want for toys he sees in the toy section. He also doesn’t watch commercial TV, so no exposure toy commercials either (he watches plenty of TV, just not commercial TV). So far he has requested a Buzz Lightyear “with wings,” a toy milk truck he saw at Braums (a local ice cream store), and that’s it. Honestly I have no problem padding those two gifts a bit with puzzles and books and calling it a nice Christmas.
Midodok
December 3, 2007 | 5:26 am2
I remember discussing an article that said Santa functioned to mask consumerism. This way, it’s not your parents giving you gifts, but Santa Clause. I don’t have the article name on hand. . .
Midodok
December 3, 2007 | 5:39 am3
I remember discussing an article that said Santa functioned to mask consumerism. This way, it’s not your parents giving you gifts, but Santa Clause. I don’t have the article name on hand. . .
I wouldn’t worry about gift giving too much.
bitchphd
December 3, 2007 | 7:44 am4
Definitely mistress of manipulation.
Somehow Santa has turned into the person who gets PK the presents I have definitely said “no” to. No, we cannot have mice, because we have a cat. But when he broke down and cried and said he didn’t want to write a letter to Santa because the only thing in the world he wanted was mice? Santa came through. No, we are not going to get you a video game system because I don’t want to fight with you over how much time you spend on it. I really meant it, too. And yet, I hear rumors that Santa found a really great deal on an eMac (which, okay, not *exactly* a video game system, but close enough).
Sigh.
Ellen
December 3, 2007 | 12:09 pm5
I love the idea of the gift poster - might try that the next time my daughter’s birthday comes around.
asrai
December 3, 2007 | 12:15 pm6
I was watching tv last night and all the various “buy from our store and you’ll have the best christmas ever” commercials. And then i turned to my daughters (overstuffed) playroom.
She has some commercialized stuff like bratz and barbies. Her birthday was in Sept, since then she’s played with her Bratz once for about 3 minutes. She would rather play with the crappy $3 thrift store blocks she’s had since birth or a cardboard box we turned into a car/airplane than those silly underdressed dolls.
So, I’m thinking of buying some better blocks or more Lego for Christmas because building a house is way better than playing house.
mom
December 3, 2007 | 4:10 pm7
Oooh - I love that, asrai — “building a house is better than playing house.” Although, Thing 1 has been playing with one of her dolls for 2 days straight (after not touching them in probably a year), and I like that too — it seems one area of play where she really makes up her own scenarios. They just go to the zoo or need to go to the doctor or whatever. I like it.
and bitch — how clever, a way to go back on your word covertly. Nice.
Hi Lisa C…. Is santa about consumerism? I’m not sure — to me consumerism is when we define ourselves and others by the things we own rather than by our talents, abilities, behaviors, challenges. So, for some it may do that — if it’s about attaining some all-important branded item to show their coolness/good taste etc., but items themselves don’t = consumerism, just consumption (which does have its own implications). So, I guess context is key to unravelling this. For my daughter, at this juncture, it’s still about excitement and surprise and play. I suspect 5 years from now, this will not be the case.
Mom'smom
December 3, 2007 | 4:14 pm8
I think my daughter got her genius from me….I love her blog
Mom Unplugged
December 3, 2007 | 4:35 pm9
You are brilliant! What an awesome idea. I personally have always taken the wimpy way out and never asked the kids what they want or even told them that they could write to Santa. Your idea solves the conundrum! It may be too late for this year, but next year I’ll have to try this. Thank you!
By the way, I know a few good lawyers if you need a name. You can always email me from jail.
mom
December 3, 2007 | 4:49 pm10
Oh my god — Hi Mom. I’ll have to stop talking about you now
Aurora
December 3, 2007 | 8:24 pm11
Oh my goodness, what an absolutely fabulous excellent COOL idea! I’m totally using it next year! Love your blog!
Woodmouse Loves Crafts
December 4, 2007 | 1:45 am12
Fantastic! As I was reading (before I got to the part about the poster board) I was thinking how my parents did it when I was a child, which was to just let me pick things out of a catalog. Each year that was actually my favorite part. Your version of selecting things that you are okay with is brilliant! I’m adopting this idea, it is just too perfect.
Amy
December 4, 2007 | 3:55 pm13
I love the poster idea. We have a wish list too, but alas the only thing on my daughter’s is a Hello Kitty “kit”. She’s never had anything Hello Kitty, but as far as yucky commercial characters go, Hello Kitty is not that harmful. So, Santa will stuff some Hello Kitty lip balms in her stocking. Otherwise, I’m free to give her some nice toys, like a marble run and a really nice set of markets (not the crappy washable kind - she’s ready for the real thing now).
One small victory: We were discussing getting an Advent calendar a few days ago, and she said brightly “Why don’t we save some money and make one?” My husband said “That’s my girl” with a smug smile, and I set about making one with my daughter as an art project. It turned out really cute; I finished it up after she went to bed so she could be surprised by what is behind each day’s window (used shrunken clipart from Microsoft Word - really easy). She can’t WAIT to open the windows each morning. Yeah!!
Amy
December 4, 2007 | 3:56 pm14
Oops, typo…I mean ‘markers’, not ‘markets’.
The Secret Ingredient
December 4, 2007 | 11:50 pm15
I too, loved circling things (dozens of things that I’d never even seen before) in the big, giant Sears catalog at Christmastime. I never got most of it, but the whole concept of “you never know” was fun. My daughter found a Lillian Vernon Kids catalog a few weeks ago and decided that she literally MUST have every freaking pink thing or princess-type thing in there. Before she found that catalog (which I accidentally left lying around), she didn’t even KNOW there were “bed tents” that looked like a princess castle. What I have found is that this is the type of stuff that gets old after a few weeks (or even days). Both my kids play with their blocks at least 3-4 times per week, and have been for a number of years now. Good creativity—–even if their main goal is to build a castle!
Laura
December 5, 2007 | 1:53 am16
Well, I think of it like this: you got a Barbie dreamhouse, and you turned out ok, right? So a little judicious princess-ing could be ok, too. I have to admit, though, that when my son begged and begged for a crappy theme toy, and I gave in, and the toy broke the first day, I felt like the universe had really cut me a break. See? I told him? It’s a bad toy, and no fun, and lets take it back and get a good toy.
blue milk
December 5, 2007 | 6:40 pm17
This was such a great post. This is the first year that my daughter is old enough to understand the concept of Christmas but she’s not yet old enough to understand the huge potential of wishing, so when we sat down to write a Santa letter and we asked her what she wanted she said - a baby’s rattle for her doll to play with. Guess we should return the trampoline we bought then - not!
radical mama
December 6, 2007 | 10:26 am18
I was on Etsy this morning and I saw lots of little fairy princess dresses for around $12. Not Disney and handmade to boot. Just thought I’d pass along the info.
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