I’m trying a new, strategy of doing work at work (innovative, no?), so this is a covert post. (Cue Mission Impossible theme music)
The last 2 days I actually gave my husband a promise over a handshake that I would not go online even for a second at the office. And, because I never, ever break a promise, I really didn’t (no one more amazed than me). But, today he forgot to make me promise (SQUEEEE!!!), so here I am. The shame, the shame… (ba-wah-ha-ha)
In all seriousness, I’ll make this quick to retain the spirit of the effort. I just had to mention that Thing 1 asked me to play her favorite “Christmas song,” Chanukkah, O, Channukah on my pod in the car. The version we have has a very clear soprano voice - light and airy and warm. Quite lovely.
So, I put it on.
“Mommy, her voice is BEAUTIFUL! Isn’t it BEAUTIFUL? Wow.”
“Sure is.”
“It’s just so pretty the way she sings.”
“Yep.”
“MOM! I think it’s BARBIE! It sounds just like Barbie.”
my head thinks: wtf? my mouth says: “Really? Who? Which Barbie?”
“The character I like.”
“Barbie the character?”
“It’s her! It’s her!”
“I don’t think so, Barbie’s plastic, honey, I don’t think she does a lot of singing. Besides, I’m almost certain she’s a wasp” (a mother has to amuse herself, no?)
“You’re silly. Barbie’s not a wasp! She’s a lady!”
And not to ruin a perfectly light hearted post, but she also told me yesterday that she knows who Ursula is from Carly’s book at school. Really? “Yes,” she says, “and she’s really bad and mean. I didn’t read the book, because I didn’t get a turn, but I could tell by her face.”
Yep. yep. yep.
Update: A bloggy friend emailed me offblog to ask if I was agreeing that Ursula was ugly. NO! Ah! Sorry. What I was doing an apparently lousy job of saying in this post is that Thing 1 has not only internalized our standards of beauty - she knows “pretty” when she sees it - but that she has also internalized our rather disturbing cultural understandings of the meaning of beauty. Since the singer’s voice is wonderful, she MUST be beautiful (blond, thin, and, in this case, plastic) and since Ursula is depicted as garish, old, and overweight, she must be mean and bad.
We spend plenty of time talking about what constitutes beauty and the consequences of this narrow (and white) definition, but there are also, of course, consequences that stem from appearance and the way others’ react to us (and the way we react to others) based on their appearance. This is also true, if less so, for men — as has been shown in research on employment (taller men get hired more than shorter men, other factors held constant).
Didn’t mean to be vague - I was just trying to post quickly and get back to working at work (it’s not as bad as I thought it would be)!
Midodok
November 30, 2007 | 11:32 pm1
Howl’s Moving Castle is a Japanese animation (and English novel) about a young woman who becomes cursed and ages very quickly. In that film, there is an old Urusala-like character who I would describe as ugly. But, I think the main character, when old, is portrayed as being lovely and brave. I guess that shows that the story itself is responsible for telling us who is and isn’t beautiful, through portrayal.
Ursula is an evil sea witch! And she should be ugly! There are already too many non-ugly Disney villains anyways (Malificent, the Queen in Snow White, The Wicked Stepmother isn’t so ugly). I think Ursula falls into a similar category as Cruella DeVille when it comes to portrayal.
Kmeson
December 1, 2007 | 2:28 am2
This is my favorite post on the topic of Barbie taking over the culture. Wicked constructed indeed!
Lisa @ Corporate Babysitter
December 1, 2007 | 10:42 am3
Mom, we must talk the same in our homes — my 5-year-old also refers to Barbie or the Princesses or whoever as “characters.” I found that funny.
Midodok, we loved Howl’s Moving Castle and your point is right on, although I never thought of it that way. It is a wonderful example of how strength and character transcend beauty — literally. I think we’ll rent it again.
candace
December 1, 2007 | 11:58 am4
we have been dealing with a lot of “he is different and she is different” type stuff. we do not live in the most diverse area and I think my almost four year old is trying to identify who she is by comparing herself to others. It’s a challenge to know how to deal with this. At first “different” was bad or “ugly” but we’ve graduated to loving “different”. Stacy’s dad was scary at first but now we love that he is different but Jiminy Cricket is different and scary. Sometimes there will be “I love different” comments out of nowhere. But one day she will be the different one. I don’t know what form it will come in and it may take awhile as she is “the norm” for central florida with blonde hair and blue eyes. But one day she will have to say she is Jewish or will have to state a belief that doesn’t go along with the crowd. And how do I explain that not everyone loves different even though that is exactly what all of us are?
by the way, I’m back. thank you for your nurturing comment that allowed me to take a break! I am feeling renewed!
The Modesto Kid
December 2, 2007 | 2:13 pm5
I remember being struck, watching Howl’s Moving Castle at how old-lady Sophie looked like she was going to be a wicked-old-lady type of character and feeling some cognitive dissonance (in a good way) throughout the film at the difference between her actions and her appearance. Miyazaki is playing with my experience of cartoon characters. I found especially interesting the variations in her appearance in the last third of the movie where she is moving back and forth between little-girl, wicked-old-lady, kindly-old-lady depictions.
The Modesto Kid
December 2, 2007 | 3:04 pm6
Sylviais looking at the picture on your post and saying “Ooh, I hate Ariel” and pointing at her and Ursula and saying “you’re stupid, you’re stupid” and telling me not to write her name.mom
December 2, 2007 | 4:55 pm7
Tell me more about this film - is it appropriate for preschoolers? Is it sexist in other ways or is it generally progressive as far as gender goes?
Jess
December 2, 2007 | 5:19 pm8
Candace, forgive me for I don’t know you, but guess what we just got free in the mail? A book about a girl dealing with being the only Jewish kid in class. It’s from http://www.pjlibrary.org, and is called “The Only One Club.”
LOL at the “Barbie is a WASP” thing!
mom
December 2, 2007 | 5:21 pm9
Oh, barbie is DEFINITELY a wasp. And if she were in high school today her name would be Peyton.
Candace
December 2, 2007 | 7:42 pm10
Jess, Thank you! I am for sure buying that!
Midodok
December 2, 2007 | 11:02 pm11
I’ve only seen this film once and a half times. I don’t think Howl’s Moving Castle is appropriate for preschoolers. There are too many scary monsters in it. And that could be traumatic.
In terms of gender and beauty, one thing that sticks out is that the male hero in the film is actually very vain and concerned with his beauty. I think I recall him saying, “I can’t live if I’m not beautiful!” after messing up his hair. The female hero is portrayed as not overly outwardly beautiful herself. This is done when compared to her family and even her own mother. However, these characters end up actually being rather shallow. I think this film could be a treat for yourself!
A film that is preschool safe and created by the same director is called “Kiki’s Delivery Service”. If you have not seen this one with your daughter and son, you will thank me when you do. It’s one of my personal favorites. Miyazaki, the director of these films, is well-known for his use of female leads.
The Modesto Kid
December 3, 2007 | 12:30 am12
Yeah, Kiki’s Delivery Service is fantastic! Is is the story of a young witch-in-training who has to leave home to complete her schooling, and has some trouble getting started. Miyazaki’s movies are interesting — I came to them expecting they would be not so great from the gender angle, because the anime genre is strongly associated with pornography and objectifying women; but his leads (who are almost all young girls) are fully realized as human characters and the stories revolve around their actions and their decisions. I don’t think the movies are 100% free of sexism and gender stereotypes but I would put them in the top rank of children’s literature.
Also possibly appropriate for preschoolers is My Neighbor Totoro but it would depend on the preschooler and I would recommend watching it beforehand to make sure it is a good fit for your kids — there is stuff in there that could be frightening.
jb
December 13, 2007 | 4:55 pm13
FYI, my almost 3-year-old loves My Neighbor Totoro, Kiki, and Howl’s Moving Castle. Spirited Away, imo a masterpiece, is still too scary — the little girl’s parents turn into pigs and she has to rescue them, which is to much for Miss M. The others I can’t recommend more highly.
Anonymous
March 18, 2008 | 12:40 pm14
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